Learn the Ability to Ask the Right Questions
The art and science of asking questions is the source of all knowledge. Thomas Berger
Humans and Questions
Humans have been asking questions since the advent of language. We don’t always ask the right questions, but we almost always have questions to ask. Unfortunately, we don’t always ask them.
What is a question?
A question is something that is said or written that requires an answer from the recipient. A question requires an answer. It is our way of gathering information and learning what we don’t know or understand. There are many types of questions but the ones that make the most sense start with why and what. Why do you believe that? Why does it rain in the desert? Why did you do that? Another great question starts with what. What do you mean by that? What did you do?
Journalist questions for a story.
who, what, why, where, and when?
Philosophers often ask deep unanswerable questions.
What is the meaning of life?
What is truth?
What is equality in our society?
What do you believe but cannot Prove?
Scientists ask their questions differently. They ask questions that can be answered by direct observation or by gathering evidence.
What is the shape of an electron?
Does time go faster at the top of a building compared to the bottom?
How can a clear object be transparent and clear at the same time?
These questions are the hardest to ask and create the most angst and fear in the asker. Primarily because they have the most invested in getting an answer they agree with.
What do you value in a relationship?
What is your first impression of me?
Do you believe in the institution of marriage?
Do you want kids? Why or why not?
The right question is the one you want an answer to that will either give you the information you need or help you decide whether or not to build a tighter relationship with another person. Asking questions is the only way to find out what we don’t know.
5 reasons we don’t ask questions.
1. We don’t really want to know the answer because of our fear.
2. We may be trying to impress so we simply respond before we understand.
3. We don’t care what the person’s answer is because our mind is made up.
4. We don’t want the person to think we are just being rude and don’t want to dialogue.
5. We don’t know how much we can gain by asking good questions.
How to Learn to ask better questions and get over your fear of questioning.
1. Ask questions. The more you ask the better you will understand which are good and which are bad.
2. Make sure your voice’s tone is not confrontational. This will defeat the purpose of getting a real answer.
3. In a relationship be sure to leave room and encourage your partner to also ask questions. Nothing kills a dialogue quicker than monosyllabic answers and only one person getting to ask questions.
4. Ask follow-up questions if you don’t understand the answer or require more clarification. But as the saying goes, “don’t beat a dead horse.” Know when to quit.
The wise man doesn’t give the right answers, he poses the right questions. Claude Levi-Strauss
I never learn anything talking. I only learn things when I ask questions. Lou Holtz
